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Steve didn’t say anything, but he felt awkward hearing Alex talk about porn. Maybe it was because he still saw Alex as his 12-year-old sister, even though he was a 17-year-old female-to-male transgender.

“Okay, I lied,” Michael said. “I do have porn on my phone.”

Michael took out his phone and he showed Steve and Alex pornographic photos and videos.

“Have you ever done any of that stuff with Allison?” Steve asked.

“Some of it,” Michael said.

“The sex must have been great , then.”

“It was. Anyway, have you and Shelly thought of any names for your son?”

“Not yet.”

“Whatever you do, don’t pick one of those weird names.”

“One of the worst names I’ve ever heard was Oral,” Alex said.

“Or how about Eddicle?” Michael asked. “It sounds like the name of a brand of painkillers. I got a headache, does anybody have any eddicle?”

Not only were the women on the ship having fun, but the men as well.

A few weeks later, The Crew landed in a town called Valentine on the planet Terra. When The Crew left the space station, they waited for a bus.

“I almost forgot,” Angel said as she handed The Crew silver cards. “These are universal debit cards. You can use them on any planet. Each has a thousand points. That converts to $2,500 Canadian, and about $5,000 Terrian…I think that’s the word I’m looking for.”

The bus arrived in front of the space station, even though it looked more like an ultramodern train.

“Where are we going?” Steve asked.

“We’re going to a hotel,” Angel said.

“They have hotels on this planet?”

“Of course. They also have electricity and plumbing too.”

“But I assume these people don’t speak English.”
“Most people here either speak Hebrew or Kratonish. They are the two most common languages in the universe.”

“I haven’t heard of a language called Kratonish before.”

“Nobody on Earth has. I have no idea why, though. Although Kratonish is like languages such as French, Spanish, and Italian.”

“Cool stuff.”

When The Crew arrived at the hotel, everybody in the lobby were staring at them.

“Why are they staring at us?” Allison asked Michael.

“I think it’s because they can tell we’re not from here,” Michael said.

“I guess they’re not used to seeing aliens here.”

“How are we the aliens?”

“Because…never mind.”

“Welcome to the Midnight Star Hotel,” the Front Desk Clerk said.

Later that day, Angel had a meeting with Sarah and Melody.

“So, you can get a minister or a government official to perform the wedding ceremony in the hotel,” Angel said. “But here’s the thing, most ministers and government officials will only marry couples of their own religion.”

“Does that mean this planet don’t separat church and state?” Melody asked.

“In some ways they do and in some ways they don’t. It’s complicated.” I’ll do my best to find somebody who will marry you two.”

“Have you ever thought about becoming a wedding planner?” Sarah asked.

“No,” Angel said. “But I’m loving this.”

The next day, The Crew ate breakfast at the hotel’s restaurant. They made plans for their stay on Terra before Melody and Sarah’s wedding. But before they went anywhere, Angel handed The Crew devices that they would wear around their necks.

“These are universal translators,” Angel said. “That way, no matter what language somebody speaks, it will sound like English to us, and when we speak, it will sound like Kratonish or Hebrew to whomever you’re talking to. It depends on the language they speak.”
“Hello, I’m Helga, and I’ll be your tour guide,” the young woman said. “We don’t get many aliens, but I’m glad you’re here. The first place we’ll visit is the church.”

The church appeared to be three floors tall. The building looked very old. The nave of the church was the size of a large auditorium. It looked like it could fit about 300 people.

“Religion is the one thing everybody on Terra have in common,” Helga said. “Years ago, The Country Dwellers and The City Dwellers all lived together. One of our proudest traditions was to build churches. Our ancestor built this church over 150 years ago. They’ve wanted to build the biggest church they’ve ever built, to show gratitude to our goddess, Terra. But over time, our ancestors had different interpretations of our scriptures. So we’ve divided ourselves into two groups: The Country Dwellers and The City Dwellers. If you would like to learn more about our religion, this church hands out free scriptures. We also hand out free pamphlets as well. We also have sermons every night at dusk.”

Sarah took one of religious pamphlets.

“Why did you take one of the pamphlets?” Melody asked.

“I’m just curious,” Sarah said.

The Crew boarded the bus. While they were there, Sarah read the religious pamphlet.

“Their religion is interesting,” Sarah said. “They believe in a goddess called Terra. Terra created two lesser gods: Selena, the goddess of the moon; and Sol, the god of the sun.”

While The Crew went sight-seeing, Angel was busy planning Melody and Sarah’s wedding. When they returned to the hotel, Sarah and Melody had a meeting with Angel.

“I have good news,” Angel said. “I’ve found a minister who’s willing to marry you two.”

“That’s great!” Melody said. “But we were hoping you would instead.”

“I asked Angel about that,” Sarah said.

“When did you do that?”

“Before I purposed.”


“I’ve looked into their laws,” Angel said. “There’s a lot of red tape to cut through to get a licence to marry couples.”

“We’re happy you’ve found somebody who was willing to,” Sarah said.

“Thanks. So, shall we check out the pool?”
Sarah, Melody, Allison, Michael, Steve, Shelly, and Angel went swimming in the hotel’s olympic-sized underground pool.

“How come Alex isn’t going swimming with us?” Shelly asked.

“I guess it’s because he’s super sensitive about his body. You know, being transgender and all.”

“Couldn’t Alex used his powers to become biologically male?”

“I guess. But then why hasn’t he done it yet? You know what, nevermind. That’s his business.”

“Changing your biologically hurts like hell,” Angel said. “I once knew somebody who tried to.”

“This pool is so warm,” Sarah said.

“It’s as warm as a hot tub,” Steve said. As they all played in the pool like little children, Melody had a psychic vision of an explosion that took place at the hotel, although she didn’t know what she saw. Suddenly, everybody in the pool heard an explosion, and the ground shook. The guests evacuated the hotel. When everybody gathered at the muster point, they saw that there was an explosion on the fourth floor. A few minutes later, several vehicles arrived, all of them had sirens. Several of them were black armoured vehicles. There were also a few vehicles that looked like ambulances, except they were green, and they were slightly longer. Finally, the fire trucks arrived. Except they were orange and yellow, and they looked like they were from the distant future.

“So, what do we do now?” Melody asked.

“I guess we’ll go back to the ship,” Angel said.

“What about the wedding?”

“It will still go ahead. It will just take place at a different location.”

Angel, Melody, and the rest of The Crew looked on in silence. All the while, Alex thought to himself, innocent people were just murdered, and they’re more concerned about the wedding.

“This is just like Earth,” Allison said.

“I know what you mean,” Michael said.

As all the guests continued to stare at the fourth floor, and as they watched the fire fighters run into the building, two men wearing a black suits pointed to the The Crew. A minute later, the men in black approached The Crew.
“You’re all wanted for questioning,” one of the men said.

The group of men placed the The Crew in one of their vehicles. A short while later, the men in black brought The Crew to a mysterious building.

“This must be their version of a police station,” Steve said.

“Must be,” Shelly said.

An old man wearing a military uniform approached The Crew.

“My name is Lt. Lyric,” the old man said. “My men brought you here so we can ask you a few questions.”

“You speak English,” Shelly said.

“Yes. The Terra Law Enforcers are required to speak Kratonish, Hebrew, and at least one other language. I can speak Kratonish, Hebrew, English, French, and Kumbya. We will bring you to a cell and we’ll interview you all, one at a time.”

The Terra Law Enforcers brought The Crew to a cell. It had a small barred window, carpet, a few benches.

“What if one of us have to use the bathroom?” Shelly asked.

“There’s a washroom to your right,” Lt. Lyric said. “Anyway, I have some paperwork to do…lots and lots of paperwork.”

Lt. Lyric left the cell and locked the door behind him.

“The authorities brought us to a cell like prisons, even though we didn’t do nothing,” Steve said.

“They must think we’ve bombed the hotel,” Shelly said.

“So, all we have to do is tell the truth. We came to Terra because Sarah and Melody are getting married.”

“They’ll want to know where we’re from,” Angel said as she looked at the ceiling. She noticed that the cell was bugged.

“I have to tell you all something,” Angel said. Before Angel said anything else, she looked up at the ceiling where the cell was bugged. She even kept shifting her eyes back and forth from her fellow cellmates to the bug, hoping that they would get the hint. “I’m not an intergalactic travel agent. I came to earth to bring you all to Oberon because that’s where you’re originally from. But don’t get me wrong, we did come to Terra so Melody and Sarah can have their wedding here.”

Shelly glanced at the ceiling; at the same spot where Angel kept looking at. Shelly quickly realized that the room was bugged as well.

“What a shock!” Shelly said.


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