BREAKING NEWS: Young People Have Jobs

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“When I was young, I used to work 16-20 hours a day, 7 days a week of hard labor,” said 69-year-old Frank Moody. “I never once got tired. Young people don’t want to work.”

People between the ages of 18 and 30 have a reputation of not wanting to work. Recently, though, social scientists have made a shocking discovery that young people have jobs.


Steve Moody, age 24, works part-time at a supermarket and he works part-time as a trucker helper during the winter. He also flips cars.

“I’m overworked,” Steve said. “But I have to work all these crazy hours to provide for my son.”

Shelly Crane, Steve’s girlfriend and the mother of his son, is getting her business degree during the day. At night, she teaches karate. Once she gets her business degree, she plans on opening her own dojo.

Steve lives with his girlfriend and her family. This is despite the fact that they are both working.

“My parents have told me that hard work never kills anybody,” Shelly said. “Don’t these people ever watch the news?”

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Justin F. H

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